Monday, September 13, 2010

The multi-Milla fantasy

Resident Evil Afterlife came out this weekend. The very thought of my ass-kicking girl crush Alice serving justice to the Umbrella Corporation makes my heart beat faster...


Oh yeah. I've been waiting for this movie.


Remember how the last one ended? with a dramatic return to the laser death room, a mutant monster villain and an army of Alice clones? Siiiigh..... you really don't have to be a genius to figure out what happens next. It doesn't matter though. I don't love these movies because they're actually good movies. I love them because they're the ultimate guilty pleasure flicks for a zombie junkie like myself. You don't have to think, you just sit back and watch monsters and bad guys get their asses royally kicked by my girl. Bonus points for this installment bringing in super delicious Wentworth Miller.


There is no way I'm not gonna like this movie.


I wonder though, if James Cameron had the testicular fortitude to make any nasty comments about Afterlife like he did Piranha 3-D?



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So I'm a HUGE fan of zombie films, and since I've been on a horror movie kick with my blogging I feel like it's appropriate to give my flesh-craving buddies a little shout-out. I haven't seen the new Resident Evil because I promised I'd wait and see it with my boyfriend, so I've put together a little zombie movie appetizer combo while I wait. Believe me, there is nothing like a nice little snack to whet your appetite before the main course.


Ok, so out of all my favorite zombie flicks, here are five I think you should probably watch to prepare your palate. Bear in mind that these may not be the "best" zombie movies I've ever seen, just the most fun. Enjoy:


Night of the Living Dead (1968)

Zombie movies were relatively bloodless before this one, which was completely revolutionary to the genre. This is the type of vision and creativity George Romero is capable of, and it's sad that his recent attempts at zombie flicks haven't even come close to making an impact on viewers that this one made. It was the first time in movie history that zombies were shown as scary, violent monsters - driven by a lust for flesh and not much else. It's cleverly written, well acted and delightfully gratuitous. I love this movie.


Planet Terror (2007)

There are lots of reasons I'd like to give Robert Rodriguez a big ole bear hug, and this movie is one of them. You want over-the-top comic book style action? You got it. You want a hot girl with a machine gun leg? You got it! You wanna see some gratuitously disgusting things happen to Quentin Tarantino? Watch this friggin movie. Do it.


Shaun of the Dead (2004)

This has the perfect balance of humor, human survival and realistic walking dead. Even though I'm convinced any fan of zombie films will love it, it's also a perfect movie for newbies to cut their teeth on. It's true to the genre, and funny without being too goofy. Also, who wouldn't want to hole up in a bar to wait for rescue? It makes perfect sense.


Zombieland (2009)

It came out a year ago and I've already seen it dozens of times. Dozens. There are very few movies that give me this much joy time and time again, but lemme tell you this one does. It's clever and witty and has just the right balance of humor and action... plus some of the ways zombies meet their end (hel-lo banjo to the face!) make me so happy I can't see straight. I won't spoil one of the greatest surprises, but there is a cameo that made me cheer out loud. I think even folks who aren't even fans of zombie movies will appreciate this one. It's America's answer to Shaun of the Dead... your move, Simon Pegg....


Resident Evil (2002)

Sigh. Of COURSE this made my top 5. It's a guilty pleasure for sure, but I'm a huge fan of Resident Evil movies and I'm not ashamed to say it. I enjoy the hell out of them. You may not know this, but the original script was written by George Romero, but was rejected and that's how Paul WS Anderson got the gig. I hate to betray the genre by saying it, but I feel like a Romero version of this movie would have destroyed the lightness that I enjoy so much. It's got a fun cast, slick action and even a decent plotline, especially for a movie based on a video game. I've seen the first three more times than I can count, and (as you know by now, duh) can't wait to see the latest!


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Also check out:


28 Days Later (2002)

The only reason this movie didn't make my top 5 is that it isn't a true zombie movie. The "zombies" in this flick aren't reanimated corpses, they're humans infected by a virus. That said though, it's probably the scariest movie on my list, excepting maybe Dawn of the Dead, because it's the most convincing and plausible. Check it out, but don't watch it alone.


FIdo (2007)

Here's a new twist on an old story: after a zombie outbreak, a company finds a way to domesticate the undead and use them as servants or pets via a collar-type device. Set in 1950s suburbia, it's an odd mix of humor and social commentary...and believe it or not it leaves you feeling both peaceful and a little disturbed at the same time. Like the tagline on the poster says, "Good dead are hard to find". Sigh... it's so true...


Zombi 2 (or 'Zombie', 1979)

This movie is a fairly cut-and-paste zombie flick with few surprises. Two things though, got it on my list. Would you like to see the most disgusting slow-motion eye-gauging scene EVER? You can get that here. Howabout a zombie attacking a shark underwater? Friggin awesome. There's also a great scene of the dead rising from the earth that puts Michael Jackson's Thriller to shame. Yeah I said it....quit being so effing sensitive. That said though, I also hope you like latex and red food coloring because the gore (with few exceptions) is pretty cheesetastic.


Dead Alive (or 'Braindead', 1992)

Oh Peter Jackson, there are so many reasons to love you. Dead Alive is one of those reasons. This has got to be one of the most fun zombie movies ever made. Kung Fu priest? check. Lawnmower used as a zombie-chopping blender? check. Zombie baby wreaking havoc on the playground? check.


Dawn of the Dead (2004)

Two words: fast zombies. I'm a big fan of the 1978 original version of this movie, but a budget and a few new ideas (hel-lo zombie baby!) just make it completely awesome. In fact, aside from it's shopping mall setting, it's a very different movie than the original. This may be the best zombie flick in existence, and if you haven't seen it, you need to. Call me up, I'll hold your hand during the scary parts.


Day of the Dead (1985)

I know this isn't considered one of Romero's "masterpieces" because it was significantly less scary than its predecessors, Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead. It did have, however, a lot more heart in that it touched on what makes zombies tick, and that the walking dead were once human and some are still capable of holding on to part of their humanity. It goes a little deeper, but still has all that gore and violence and flesh-craving goodness we love in our undead.

1 comment:

  1. Then you need to come check out the Zombie Walk, part of this year's Modern Film Fest at The Gem Theatre in Kannapolis, Oct. 1-3.

    Guaranteed to be a great time! Tell your friends!

    http://www.modernfilmfest.net

    ReplyDelete